#13 Beta Test

I looked at the journal of a woman who says she participated in the beta test for AOL Journals.  I didn't think there was a beta test.  Doesn't look like there was more than functional testing.  If I had been a tester, here are some of the comments I'd have made within the first day:

. The "moods" list looks like it was made up by a 15-year old girl with extreme mood swings.  I need "Contented" ("chillin'" or "happy" just aren't the same), and "Annoyed" (not the same as "angry"), and "Wistful" or "Pensive" (not at all the same as "sad").  If you can trust us with the contents, why can't you trust us to fill in our own word for mood? 

. After reading the entries of some other bloggers, please, please, a spellchecker! 

. I've been composing in a dumy email, where I have spellcheck, then pasting into the 'create an entry' form.  After pasting, and even after some more editing, my paragraph structure is still there.  So I 'save' it.  And suddenly no more paragraphs - it's all mass.  I have to 'edit' the entry, and break it into paragraphs again.  Please maintain paragraphs when cut-and-pasted from other editors.  If it shows after the paste, it can be maintained over the save.  I did see something about turning something or other off in the hints/news, but I don't know how to do that in email.  We Luddites can't be expected to figure it out whatever the problem is - you handle it!. 

. The entries are last-in-first-out.  Perhaps this is the way other similar journals are, but it is not necessary to follow suit.  We lazy people are most likely to read first whatever shows at the top of the page.  If it doesn't catch our interest, we move on.  If it does catch us, we continue to read the entries in reverse chronological order, so sometimes things just don't make any sense.  Or the suspense is lost.  It would be most useful to have the oldest displayable entry at the top.  Doesn't change the interest factor, but it improves the reading flow enormously.  (And it's a lot easier than living my life backward.)   

 

#12 Timecards!

The government workers' union in the state capitol is on strike because - get this - they are being asked to punch in and out.

Hourly workers on strike because they have to punch in and out.

Did the world tip sideways and I missed it? 

#11 Money, Happiness?

"They" always say that money can't buy happiness.

I don't have enough money for everything I want.

I do have enough money for everything I need,

and

I have that tiny bit more that means I don't have to do anything I don't want to do,

and that does buy happiness! 

#10 I think maybe Jay lied to me.

I think maybe Jay told me a flat-out bald-faced lie!  Maybe.  

Back in the 80s, when we were just friends, I noticed that occasionally he would give a technically true answer to a badly phrased question, in such a way that everything he said was the exact truth, but that somehow managed to leave you with an impression that was not strictly true.  He would then allow you to believe the untruth, would not correct you even when you made statements or decisions based on the untruth.  (If you asked the question correctly, you'd get the whole truth, so I don't think he saw it as lying.)  After I got to know him better, I could tell when he was doing it.  He'd get an odd look on his face - sort of like one raised eyebrow "well, come on..." but not quite.  Maybe he saw it as a game.  

Once we became intimate, I told him that if I asked him about something, and he knew that the impression I got from his answer was untrue, and he didn't correct it, then I'd consider it the same as telling me a lie.  It's a "lie by omission", and I wouldn't like it.  So he stopped doing it altogether, as far as I know.  He did ask me to be sensitive as to what I asked him.  Not "don't ask if you won't like the answer", it was more like "be gentle, don't make it hard for me to tell the whole truth".    

One thing that I used to tease him about was his rabid Republicanism.  As far as he was concerned, no Republican could do any wrong, and no Democrat could do any right.  Ever.  I teased him because it didn't fit with his otherwise open and questing mind.  It seemed to be such a block, like he was born with it, like in that area of his mind there was a knot he couldn't untie. 

I consider myself middle of the road.  I disliked Kennedy.  I liked Dole.  I liked Clinton.  I despise Rush Limbaugh.  I am registered Independent.   My votes are all over the board.  From all his other characteristics, I would have expected Jay to be similar.  Last election I voted for Nader (but only because in this state, it wouldn't have made a difference, and it was a chance to make a statement).  Jay said he voted for Nader too (I didn't ask).  

Just before the 1996 elections, I was complaining that I couldn't vote in the local primaries, and I asked him if he was going to.  He said he couldn't, because he'd registered Independent, too.  I couldn't believe it.  "You're not registered Republican?"  "No."  "Were you ever registered Republican?"  "Nope."  "I can't believe it!  Really?  Why?"  "Don't want to be on anybody's list."     

So, imagine my shock last Wednesday when I opened an envelope addressed to Jay, and found a letter from the Republican National Committee asking why they hadn't heard from him in so long ... still be a member ... count on your support ... usual donation ... etc.   

Did Jay lie to me?

Maybe he was REGISTERED Independent, but was a MEMBER of the Republican Party?  He knew that disconnect never would have occurred to me.  They're both the same to me until I think about it.  He knew darn well what I was really asking!  Was this a "lie of omission"?   

This may explain why Jay would get all kinds of political reminders in the mail for local elections and so on, that I never got.  "How come they remind you but not me?  Doesn't anybody want me to vote?"  "Dunno.  Maybe because the house is in my name."   The only way I can reconcile this with the Jay who was otherwise so open and honest and trusting with me is that all of his political thinking and reactions were so foreign to the rest of his mind, like it was split off from the main Jay, a bit of not-Jay coexisting with him.  Perhaps it was not-Jay who lied to me (allowed me to believe an untruth).

-------------

Please note that I am not disappointed that he may have been a member of the Republican party.  Heck - I thought he was (as much as I thought about it at all) when I married him.  (At least he had perfect aim in the bathroom....)  I am disappointed because he may not have been honest about it.

#9 Books I'm Reading

As usual, I have several books going at once.    

At bedtime:  Skeletons on the Zahara, Dean King.  A true story.  In 1815, an American merchant ship out of New England wrecked on the west coast of Africa, and the captain and crew were captured and enslaved by the nomadic people of the Sahara Desert.  This is the story of their travails and eventual rescue, as detailed in their own journals.  I had been entranced by the Shackelton (sp?) story, so I thought I would like this - there would be more interesting things to observe in a caravan than alone in Antarctica - but it is very dryly written.  I guess the author has taken pains not to attempt to color the men's own journal accounts.     

Carrying around in my purse for "waiting times":  The Odd Women, George Gissing.  First published in 1893, a novel about marriage and spinsterhood in the Victorian era.  I haven't got very far into it yet, but the introduction by Elaine Showalter was very interesting.  I highly recommend at least the introduction.  I hope the novel lives up to it.  I'll let you know later.    

For bits and pieces of time:  Eats, Shoots & Leaves, Lynne Truss.  About the sad state of grammar, in particular punctuation.  Subtitle: The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation.  I'm less than a quarter of the way through, but I already have a renewed urge to paint over that "10 items or less" sign, and all those apostrophes on plural nouns (noun's!) all over town!   

#8 The Fireworks

I've seen some good fireworks over the years - DisneyWorld, Washington DC, Saint Louis - but minute for minute, Sunday evening in Kingston may have been the best ever.  Must have cost a fortune.   

The bridge crosses high over the creek, between Kingston and Port Ewen.  On the Port Ewen side, there are some high undeveloped tree-covered bluffs between the village and the creek.  They did the fireworks from the bridge and the bluffs.  

It seemed like there were never fewer than 5 blossoms in the air at once, and there was no time space between shots.  They had a LOT of the double and triple ones - where a chrysanthemum blooms, and then each of the rays bloom into different color mum, then each of those rays bloom again, and each separate blooming made a different sound - boom, or crackle, or scream.  Even the few single mums were spectacular - they were wider than the visual field of my glasses.   Some mums rained screaming flaming corkscrews.  The crowd favorite was when they shot up one after another rocket very high, which then opened to rain down very long quiet showers of white sparkles - it looked like five huge waterfalls in the sky.  They did that a few times, scattered throughout the show.  The other favorite was when they lit one end of the bridge, and a shower of white sparkles spread along the length of the bridge, cascading down to the creek, Niagara Falls, and then fountains shot up above the bridge.  Very pretty.  The cascade lasted a long time, too.   

There was so much that was so spectacular that several times I thought we were seeing the - I forget what it's called, when they shoot off everything they've got at the end - I thought we were seeing that, and that the fireworks were over, but they kept on going and going, at that high level, for more than a half hour.     

It got to where you could see a steady red glow in the trees on the bluff across the creek.  It looked like the trees were on fire.  Some of the people around me were concerned that that was indeed the case.  After the fireworks were over (and the glow dissipated), I heard a guy behind me say "Well, the mayor of Kingston said he was going to burn Port Ewen down.  Looks like he damn near did it!"   (That's when I remembered there's a dynamite factory inPort Ewen.  The other end of town, but still....  Terrorists could have blown up the factory that evening, and no one would have noticed!)   

One thing that amazed me was how nice, polite, and orderly the crowd was.  The city had put fragile orange temporary fencing around the flower beds.  When I saw that Saturday night, I figured it wouldn't last long - but when I left Sunday evening, it looked like even in the most densely packed areas the fencing was still up and the flowers were untrampled.  Cool.   

During the shuttle ride back to the car, an ambulance passed headed down.  Apparently things got a little nastier around midnight.  There was a stabbing, and a "violent domestic dispute", and some guy arrested for disturbing the peace kicked out a window in a police car (or maybe he kicked out the window and then got arrested?)   I guess I know now why the food venders didn't hang around.  

Oh, almost forgot - Something interesting happened when I was walking up to the shuttle stop.  I was wrapped from hip to chin in the monk's shawl, and walked past a group of three middle-aged men, when one said "Hello Sweetie.  How are you doing?"  I don't get flirting-in-passing anymore, so I figured it had to be someone I knew, so I turned around, and it was a stranger.  Nice looking, too.  And he really was talking to me (yeah, I looked around to make sure).   

#7 Last Sunday

The Rhinebeck Craft Fair ended at about 5 PM on Sunday, so I got there about 2.   Something I'll never understand about the Dutchess County Fairgrounds parking - they start parking cars in the fields near the entry gate, and spread out from there.  As the day wears on, the cars are being parked farther and farther from the gate, BUT, people who came early have left!  The parking geniuses don't direct any cars to any of the spaces now open near the gate.  When I arrived, there were only 4 or 5 cars in the 2 acres near the gate, but they directed arriving cars way the heck out to the "north forty".  I walked a half mile+ over lumpy fields to the gate. 

Moving fast, I got through everything.  I bought a decorated cane, a fringed duster, some chai marmalade, vegetable dip mix, and a necklace.  There's a photographer who sells photos he takes in Provence (France), from whom I try to buy a print every year (one of these days I'll hang them), but he wasn't there this year.  I wish I had talked May into going.  I suspect she was thinking "crafts, uh-huh - plastic beads strung on pipe cleaners".  This stuff is all so good it doesn't look handmade any more, which is a bit of a disappointment.  It's not easy to take "I-can-do-that!" ideas home.  It's all getting too expensive, too, and unlike the antiques fair, these people don't bargain.  But I can't not go.

I got home about 5:15, and I was so very tired.  I'd done a lot of walking and standing over the past three days, and had been sleeping badly.  I was falling asleep over the keyboard.  I debated whether or not to go to the fireworks.  They were going to be at 10 PM.  The entire Rondout was going to be blocked to cars.  You could park at any of several uptown lots and take a shuttle to the Rondout, but the shuttle let you off at the top of the hill, several blocks from the creek.  Given how much I hate crowds (they tire me), the walking and hills involved, and how tired I was, I decided not to go.

At about 6:30 PM I discovered myself standing at the front door in a caftan, with a large raw silk Tibetan monk's shawl and my purse over my arm, and car keys in hand, ready to go.  I swear I must have dressed in my sleep.  I think what happened was that I went into the bedroom to lie down, went into the closet to take off what I was wearing, and then forgot why I was there, so I changed clothes.

I parked at Kingston Mall in uptown and took a trolley-bus (Kingston's attempt to charm tourists - it looks like a trolley, but it's a bus) free shuttle to the Rondout.  The place was already packed solid with people, and booths selling food and junk, and wandering vendors with glowing or blinking thingies.  All the way down lower Broadway you had to edge through the crowd.  Being short, my nose comes to the middle of other people's chests, so I wanted to find an open space somewhere to stand, so I could see without getting pummeled.  George and Robin had mentioned that they had a friend with a boat who had invited them to watch from the boat, so I went down to the creek to see if maybe I could find them.  I didn't find them - too many too big boats, too many people - but I did find a clear spot in front of a signboard which would protect my back, right on the edge of the path along the creek, so I could watch the crowds go by and have an unobstructed view of the bridge.  I stood there from about 8 until the fireworks were over at 10:30.  I was starving, but I was afraid to move or I'd lose my perfect spot.

And it WAS the perfect spot for the fireworks.  I'll tell you about them in the next entry (running out of space here, I think).

After the fireworks, I headed for the food booths, and was shocked to find them packing up!  No food.  A gazillion restaurants around, and none open.  I headed for the shuttle pickup area (UP hill!) and found everyone else there too.  It's only maybe two or three miles to the lot where my car was, and I was so jazzed by the fireworks (the best I'd ever seen, I'm so glad I dress in my sleep!) I seriously considered just walking to the car, with a stop at the McDonalds halfway up Broadway - and stopped dead at the "up".  It would be all up hill to uptown - I guess that's why they call it uptown. 

Trolley-bus to car, stopped  for an omelet at what used to be the Texas Diner on Albany Avenue but now has some other name (placed was packed - I sat at the counter and kept sliding off the stool!), home a little after 2 AM,  and eventually to bed.  

My right knee was swollen and had a hot spot Monday morning, but it seemed better by afternoon - just a little ache left.

#6 Last Saturday

I got home from the Ulster Fairgrounds about 10 PM Friday night, and then I don't know what happened.  I futzed around the house, and it was suddenly 3 AM.  I wanted to get to the craft fair early the next day so that I could go to the Independence Day celebration in the evening.  

I went to bed, but couldn't get to sleep.  I had been working some logic puzzles before sleep for the past few nights, and had hit one that was driving me crazy (turns out the puzzle description was wrong!), so that kept me awake another hour.  And then just as I was finally dropping off, I heard a loud bang, very close, like something had hit the house.  That woke me completely up, and I didn't get back to sleep until sometime after 6 AM. 

I woke at 2 PMish.  Pretty much shot the craft fair.  Oh, well, I can do that tomorrow.    I wanted to get to the Rondout very early in the evening.  The last time Jay and I went to the fireworks (several years ago), we had to park about a mile up the divided highway, and that hill is no fun at the end of an evening.  Also, I didn't know what time the fireworks were, and I remembered that Jay and I had thought they were too early, before full dark. 

I arrived at the Rondout at 5 PM.  No crowds.  I parked only 2 blocks from the creek.  I did notice something rather odd - all the streets all around had signs posted everywhere saying "No Parking, 4 AM - Midnight, Sunday June 27, Independence Celebration".  Luckily, I had the regional calendar in the car, so I checked.  Yup.  Fireworks tonight, Saturday.  Maybe there's other stuff tomorrow?  

The Rondout is apparently the place to be on a Saturday night.  By 8 PM, there were crowds everywhere, but still not what I'd expect for fireworks.  I sat on a bench near the creek and read my book until it got too dark for easy reading, then I looked at all the fancy boats, and checked out all the snazzy new restaurants.  There were two concerts going on simultaneously - Salsa to the west, and rock to the east.  About 9:30 PM I wandered over to the tourism office, and found a calendar, which said the fireworks were to be Sunday.  Sigh.  I headed back to my car.  

As I was passing a bistro, I heard someone call to me from an outside table.  It was George, the auctioneer, and Robin, the appraiser, from the Red Hook auction house.  They had finished eating and were about ready to go, but when I asked if the kitchen was still open, they stayed with me.  I really enjoyed talking with them.  I'm sure George is very nice, but there's something of the devil behind his eyes.  Robin is just plain sweet.  I really enjoyed the next hour or so with them.  

Got home late.  Got to bed very late.  Heard the "bang" sound again as I was falling asleep, which kept me awake again for another few hours. (It happened again Sunday and Monday nights.  It happens just as I'm dropping off.  I think it's in my head!)  Maybe it's time to get a dog.  I really don't like strange noises at night, whether they're in my head or not.

#5 Last Friday

Well, the weekend didn't go entirely as planned, but it was still pretty good.  I set the clock-radio to go off early Friday morning, so I could spray the weeds, and when it went off, the first words I heard were "rain this afternoon", so I groaned and went back to sleep.  Didn't wake again until after noon.  

I got to the Ulster County Fairgrounds at about 4 PM.  The article I had read said that you could get up close and personal with the horses until 5 PM (the show was at 7).  When I arrived, there were no other cars in the parking lot.  No signs.  The ring next to the parking lot was empty, but there were a lot of RVs and tractor-trailer-type horse trailers near it, and a large tent where I could see travel stalls set up, and huge white horses in the stalls.  I walked toward there, and found no people, although the RV doors were mostly open.  I was greeted by three friendly dogs (and two unfriendly ones tied under RVs, who set up a row), but no people.  I began to wonder if I had the wrong night, or if maybe a space ship had spirited all the people away.  I wandered around a bit, "Hello!  Anybody here?", and finally just went into the tent and talked to the horses.  They were quite friendly.   

About 4:30, when I was beginning to wonder if I should just go home, some young women arrived and began feeding the horses.  I gathered later that they had all been in town for dinner.  They ignored me.  Then another woman arrived.  She had an enormous grin, and bustled from stall to stall, asking the workers all kinds of questions.  I gathered that she just LOVED horses (although judging from her questions she didn't know a whole lot about them) and was just THRILLED to be here, and isn't this just SO exciting.... I decided to wander off myself. 

There was more than enough time to go to Kingston and pick up May and bring her back in time for the show, so I called her and told her all about it.  At first she said yes, but then after she thought about it a bit, she changed her mind.  I told her I planned to go to the craft fair on Saturday, and she said that craft fairs weren't her thing.  I'm not sure that what she had in mind for "craft fair" was anything near the actuality, but I was argued out.  However, she'd got a care package from a relative, and invited NJKC and me over to eat it, so at least she's not withdrawing.  (Note to self - tell NJKC.)  

Talked to May for 45 minutes.  Wandered around.  Read my book.  Finally it was time for the show.  I didn't count, but I don't think there were more than 60-80 adults in the stands.   

The first and last time I had seen the Lipizzan Stallions was in the middle 50's, in Ottawa, Canada.  The Queen Mum was visiting, and since she loved horses, one of the events during her stay was horses.  First there was the Spanish Riding School, then the Lipizzaners, then the Royal Canadian Mounted Police Musical Ride - the full complement!  What I remember most from that night was the precision.  Something like 500 mountie horses all moving in arrow-straight lines, all in step, all in exact time with the music.  The Lipizzans were as precise.   These Lipizzans, Friday night, were not precise.  They'd have four horses across, but their chests were not even, not even close to even.  They did all the same centuries-old movements and patterns, but there seemed to be a very la-de-da attitude toward them.   I was very disappointed.  To make it worse, the patriarch had a heavy Austrian accent, distorted further by the (unnecessary) sound system, so you couldn't understand half of what he said.  

Oh, well.  I glad I went.  

I was a bit miffed that it hadn't rained at all.  I might have missed my only chance to spray the thistles before full summer.  The sky had been very heavy all day.  At the fairgrounds I got one drop of rain on my glasses, and then the sky cleared.  But when I drove home, as soon as I crossed the village line, the roads were wet.  The garbage can left at the end of the driveway in the morning had about 2 inches of water in it.  A neighbor told me it had poured early in the evening.  So it's a good thing I didn't spray after all.

#4 Weekend Plans

Big weekend coming up!  The Royal Lipizzan Stallions will be at the Ulster County Fairgrounds Friday and Saturday evenings, Dutchess County Fairgrounds will have the craft fair Saturday and Sunday, Kingston will have live bands and fireworks at the Rondout Saturday evening (Independence Day early), and the Willow Creek Bluegrass Music Festival is all weekend down near Newburgh.  And tomorrow begins the first guaranteed three-day no-rain period since March.  I've been waiting since spring for three days without rain so I can spray the poison ivy, thistles, and sumacs.  

So - my planned schedule for the next three days:  Get up early tomorrow (Friday) and spray the weeds.  Wash hair.  See if I can persuade May to go to something with me.  Go see the Lipizzans (up until 5PM you can talk to them and maybe touch them, show is at 7PM, so ok, I'll take a book for the intervening two hours).  Saturday, Craft Fair early, then to Kingston Rondout for food, music, and fireworks.  Last time Jay and I went, we had to park almost a mile away on the divided highway, and since then, they have built all those townhouses on the Rondout parking lot, so I have to go really early if I want to park closer (ok, so I'll take a book...).  Sunday, Bluegrass.  Sunday's a little iffy - it's at Thomas Bull Memorial Park in Montgomery, and I haven't tried to pin that down on a map yet.  

The Women  in Black will be holding silent vigil from 10:30-11:30 AM Saturday in front of the bookstore in Red Hook.  One of the women in Mensa is a member, and she's always inviting me to stand with them.  I'd love to join them Saturday (would my burka be inappropriate?) but I don't think I can fit that into the schedule - unless I ashcan the bluegrass and do crafts Sunday --- ah, the difficulties of a full life!

#3 Girl

I still remember the first time I was referred to as a "woman".  It was 1969, and I was 24 years old.  Women didn't get a lot of respect back then anyway (we were all "girls") and at 4'10" I got a lot less.  I was walking across a grocery store parking lot on a bright summer day when I heard a wolf whistle behind me.  I turned around to look, and saw two very embarrassed 12-year-old boys in a car - "Uh-oh!  That's not a girl!  That's a woman!".   Made my day.

Yesterday I had stopped to talk with a neighbor in his yard (the guy who mows my lawn, and who bought the Chevy), and his little daughter was with him.  She may be 5 or 6.  Later, I knocked on his door to deliver some car-related papers.  The little girl peeked through the glass panels next to the door, and called "Daddy!  It's that girl again!"   Made my day.  

 

#2 AOL's Shallow Idiot

Aol offers members topics to vote (and comment) on.  Today's was something like "what is the most important quality in a future mate?"  Choices offered were "Good-looking", "Popular", and "Wealthy".  You can't comment until after you make a choice.  My immediate thought was "What kind of shallow idiot made up this list?  what happened to things like Intelligent, Capable of  loving back, Sensitivity, Honesty and Integrity, etc.?  The real stuff?"  Unfortunately, having all the real stuff doesn't make you popular.  The sweetest people are often quiet and retiring.  Everybody who knows them well likes them, but they're not "popular". 

#1 The Beginning

I just started this, and already I am frustrated.  "Help" says that to assign this to a community, I should select the "down arrow" next to "Community", and go down the list to...etc.  The only "Community" I can find anywhere on my screen doesn't have a "down arrow"!  Sob.  Also, when I click on the "Edit" button under "About Me", nothing happens.  Excuse me while I go beat my head against a wall........